Tshirts are in!!!! So blessed and I love them.  My mom got her’s and sent me a pic from her deck today.  

We had a pretty busy weekend.  My parents came in and visited so that was fun.  We were busy trying to get to closets and do things that needed to get done before the school year starts.  It’s amazing how much I have really slowed down this summer compared to my normal self and there was a lot that was on the list to get done this summer.  I have had to solicit help from many people including my parents and Scott’s to get some of it done.  Oh well, it will still be here next summer to accomplish right?  You guys have filled up my card scrapbook that I’ve had to move on to another one!  What a sweet blessing…

FAMILY PHOTO AFTER CHURCH ON SUNDAY

I have also been looking at boxes in the basement – insert crazy lips and eyes – I told Scott we have got to commit to going through one to two boxes a week.  We have not done a good job keeping up with all of our “stuff” from the almost 20 years we’ve been together and from before that our parents so graciously gave us – Help! We also haven’t moved in a long time so, we have boxes and boxes of stuff!  So, I have sent many car trips to Good Will or the garbage bin.  I promise I’m not nesting and I am not pregnant!!!  Some of my most fun stuff to look at has been looking at my high school soccer stuff.  So many great memories.  I tried to look through some slides…not very easy.  Scott and I went through some old VHS tapes from when we worked together in Quincy.  We have newscasts and game broadcasts on tape.  It makes you feel pretty old….ha!

So something really cool.  I have to admit..not a super BIG fan of having no hair.  I’ve learned to live under a hat most days or with a scarf.  Now here’s something…I can’t find the right size scarf anywhere.  I don’t know if I’m not looking at the right spot or what.  IF you know of a good place to buy scarfs, please let me know.  Anyway, back to what matters…. I was looking in the mirror at the back of my head and I noticed I have finger prints on head.  Actually I have fingers on the back of my head!  I thought Lord, you have been holding my head just like we have prayed and here’s the evidence.  Guys, isn’t that just awesome!  I realize God’s hands are waaaaaayyyyyy bigger but, he gave me something tangible I could see.  Amazing…

My head has responded pretty well in the treatment as far as the skin on my head goes.  I am very thankful for that…. Shout out to my girl Sarah Wilson and her Arbonne stuff she gave me!!!!!

I had the blessed opportunity to spend time with a dear person in my life Necole Kreie.  I’ve known her and her family for a long time.  Her three kids had been in my student ministry and she and I, along with Scott, all sang and served together on the music ministry team.  We had a fun time catching up, laughing and sharing.  Thank you Necole for the meal and the time invested.  So much fun.

Let me just say that the girls have become pretty good drivers the past week.  They had

my mom and dad going everywhere and have become more confident and so that makes me excited.  Considering that they have to drive me to school in a couple weeks!  Good seeing my parents and thankful they were willing to come down and help around the house and give my in-laws a break!

“O Lord, do not stay far away!  You are my strength; come quickly to my aid…..I will Praise you in the great assembly.  I will fulfill my vows in the presence of those who worship you…For Royal Power Belongs to the Lord.  He rules all the nations.”

Psalms 22:19, 25 & 28 

In reading about all of these kings in 2 Chronicles it’s amazing to see how each started out so differently.  Even though they were usually raised by the previous king, how they ended up or what they decided wasn’t determined always (usually) by their fathers.  

Uzziah became king of Judah after Amaziah…Amaziah had turned from God and did his own thing.  He started out following the Lord, but it said “not wholeheartedly…” He became very defiant and worshed other idols, even with clear direction that he would be punished.  His heart was so hard, that no amount of pleading and trying to convince him.  He wanted to do things his own way.  He ended up being assassinated.

His son Uzziah was crowned king when he was 16 years old.  At this age and what he saw from his father, you might think he would go his own way.  Yet the Bible tells us twice that he was 16 when he took over and in verse 5 it says…

“⁵ He sought God during the days of Zechariah, who instructed him in the fear^[b] of God. As long as he sought the Lord, God gave him success.”

He had people, especially the prophet Zechariah,  pouring into him.  He was humble enough to listen to what Zechariah suggested and because of this – HE SUCCEEDED.  The things he set up to do, the new towns he build – he was given success.  He defeated many armies ……

⁸ The Ammonites brought tribute to Uzziah, and his fame spread as far as the border of Egypt, because he had become very powerful.

Uzziah was prepared and God had given him everything he needed to succeed…

¹¹ Uzziah had a well-trained army, ready to go out by divisions according to their numbers as mustered by Jeiel the secretary and Maaseiah the officer under the direction of Hananiah, one of the royal officials. ¹² The total number of family leaders over the fighting men was 2,600.¹³ Under their command was an army of 307,500 men trained for war, a powerful force to support the king against his enemies. ¹⁴ Uzziah provided shields, spears, helmets, coats of armor, bows and slingstones for the entire army. ¹⁵ In Jerusalem he made devices invented for use on the towers and on the corner defenses so that soldiers could shoot arrows and hurl large stones from the walls. His fame spread far and wide, for he was greatly helped until he became powerful.

AHHHH BUT – Dang it!  He decided to do what his father had done.  He had rested for years, had success, life was good and HE DETERMINDED THAT HE WAS THE REASON FOR ALL  OF THE THEIR SUCCESS.

¹⁶ But after Uzziah became powerful, his pride led to his downfall. He was unfaithful to the Lord his God, and entered the temple of the Lord to burn incense on the altar of incense.¹⁷ Azariah the priest with eighty other courageous priests of the Lord followed him in. ¹⁸ They confronted King Uzziah and said, “It is not right for you, Uzziah, to burn incense to the Lord. That is for the priests, the descendants of Aaron, who have been consecrated to burn incense. Leave the sanctuary, for you have been unfaithful; and you will not be honored by the Lord God.”

¹⁹ Uzziah, who had a censer in his hand ready to burn incense, became angry. While he was raging at the priests in their presence before the incense altar in the Lord’s temple, leprosy^[c]broke out on his forehead. ²⁰ When Azariah the chief priest and all the other priests looked at him, they saw that he had leprosy on his forehead, so they hurried him out. Indeed, he himself was eager to leave, because the Lord had afflicted him.

Uzziah had leprosy until the day he died.  Here Uzziah had started strong, faithful, ready for battle and led his people well.  And then he got proud…of himself.  He forgot where his blessings had come from and how he was able to do the things he was doing.  We see this a lot today don’t we?   Maybe we do this ourselves from time time or more times than we care to admit.  Success occurs and before we know it, WE are taking credit and we start living without including God and then before we know it, we live like He’s not even a part of our lives.  Some of us continue and decide WE will be our own god and we puff out our chests and live like we are important and all that matters.  

Success is a great feeling.  I have experience the “highs of succeeding” in many areas of life.  But, if we aren’t careful, we start to see ourselves as the reason we have succeeded and we blow ourselves up into something that we are not.  And bottom line, God is so good to bring us and draw us back, so we can experience REAL living with HIM!

It’s easy for us to read these passages and think a couple of things:

• Am I going through a bad time because God is punishing me?
• Life is good for me so God must be ok with where I am at!

These are hard and almost dangerous questions for us to spend time focusing on.  Because the focus is on US !!!!  As people, this is our problem and downfall.  We are not the focus, GOD IS!  He is working all the time and desires, DESIRES, to use us in many different situations.  If God is our focus, then when our circumstances change, God remains the same – HE NEVER CHANGES.  And I have been so blessed by this Truth this year.  I don’t know what is in my future, but I know who has it!  He has given me everything I have needed and has surrounded me and carried me.  He has been my focus and has been MORE than I could’ve imagined.  No matter our circumstance, our heart should be focused on HIM and Choosing to live for Him no matter what is going on around us….because that can change in an instant.  It did for me.  One of the healthiest people I know, no problems, never had a headache, never had issue… BUT in a moment it changed.  BUT GOD never did.  He is my sun – my focus.  He has given me peace and I have seen Him do too much, that it’s faith strengthening for sure.

Take the time to be with HIM no matter your circumestance.  Ask Him to speak to you, seek Him and He will be found.  Don’t give up…. He is worth it!

As I get ready to go back to school, I am excited to see students, teachers and get away from the treatment cycle.  But, there are still so many unknowns.  I was planning for the state champtionship this time last year and determined to give my all to my teams and my students.  I was blessed by such a great year.  I am thankful to be given the opportunity and the students who will be in my classes.

Please pray for me for the following:

• I have TWO more treatments.  I am praying against tiredness and things that come physically.  I have been so blessed and I am thankful that the Lord has sustained my energy and allowed me to get some of the things around the house organized and ready for school
• Pray that as I prepare for OPEN HOUSE that I have everything I need and I know what I need to share.
• I know many of you have been and are already praying for clear scans.  I do not know when I will be scheduled for my scans and what comes next.  I will be seeing my oncologist Thursday and getting blood drawn.  We are expecting a long day with setting up what’s next.  We are not anticipating a scan for at least 3 weeks and could go a couple months.  
• Pray for this continual on and off sensation in my throat and mouth.  Pray I can continue to be joyful and just BE with the Lord in these short moments.
• Pray for wisdom from my doctors on what to do next.

Thanks Warriors!

It has been a pretty crazy week.  To think that I have only 4 more days – 4 more days of treatment is crazy.  Where did the time go?  I have to say, I am probably just now starting to feel some of the symptoms or drain of the treatment.  I am a little more tired sometimes and having an acid type feeling that comes up and burns every once in a while.  I am thankful that the Lord continues to fight for me and has held me up each and every day.  Thank you for the continued prayers.  Now, I am starting to think about life beyond my getting up and going to treatment every day and waiting to come back the next.  I have been so blessed by the people up there and their care for me, that I will miss them and the laughs we’ve had.  Love you guys!

My parents have been in town all week so they have come up to treatments and been able to see what all goes on up there.  It’s a blessing to meet new people and to hear their stories … it’s also great to give God the glory and to see how many people up there are focused on Him during this time.  It’s like a mini church sermon and praise and worship session.

Took this pic this morning of my chemo pill.  So, some have asked and I probably haven’t explained too well… but I take a chemo pill about 45 minutes before radiation and then I also take the pill on the weekends.  When I am done with radiation I’ll get a break from the pill until after the scans and then more than likely will take the pill once a month for a week until ???? don’t know that.  But yes I have to wear a glove to handle this pill.

This week has been a little crazy!  Girls were at soccer camp and came home and crashed!  They loved UCA and hanging with their buds and meeting new people.  Nathan was a chatty box this week-probably because girls were gone.  He was busy talking to me about everything, he likes to come out on the deck and hear some of what I’m reading and then unpack everything he’s thinking about.  His biggest thing all week was he wanted to cook me breakfast.  He didn’t understand I get up earlier than him to be with the Lord and I eat early so I can stay on schedule.  Well he wanted to make me fried eggs, so he made me and my dad fried eggs one morning.  So sweet.  Grandpa said he would take him for ice cream if he did 4 chores, so he was busy doing all kinds of things.  He and my mom organized a closet and put together all of the baby puzzles.  My mom made Kale “chips” and Nathan actually tried them, didn’t like them thus the face that looks like he’s choking, but he tried them.  He’s a crazy little kid.

Also so blessed by so many visitors bringing dinner and stopping by to chat.  Love seeing and being blessed by so many.  Thank you all so much for the food and the prayers.  Had fun seeing the Lorios and the Humphreys – beautiful flowers (below) – I don’t always remember to take pics!  Thankfully Scott reminds me when he’s around.  We were blessed by our neighbors the Greens – no picture 🙁 and Nathan has been running around wild with his little buddy (their son) Soren.

Some new things this week…. SOCCER Training begins….school organization is about official….Hope Warrior shirts are in….treatment ends…..Yeah!

“Let my teaching fall like rain and my words descend like dew, like showers on new grass, like abundant rain on tender plants.”

Deuteronomy 32:2

I have to admit, every time I sit and read the Bible I am always sitting there thinking I could write about this…and then I move on to the next book of the Bible I’m reading and I think, wow blow me away.  I wish I could just sit and talk, share and grow with each of you everyday.  You all have no idea…and I have no idea who all is reading this… but you have encouraged me in this fight and kept me focused where I need to be.  Not on me, but on Him and allowing Him to speak whatever He desires through me.  I am blessed – blessed.

Reading in 2 Chronicles about King Jehoshaphat who was King of Judah who started out following after the Lord hard.  After war and time he was told that the Lord was angry with him because he was helping the wicked and hating those who loved the Lord.  He could’ve responded any way he wanted to, this seer that came to him could’ve been killed on the spot.  But, when the seer came to King J and told him what was about to happen, this is what he did…

“Jehoshaphat lived inJerusalem, but he went out among the people, traveling from Beersheba to the hill country of Ephraim, encouraging the people to return to the Lord, the God of their ancestors.”  He went out and appointed judges and told them how to judge and to “Fear the Lord”….These were his instructions to them: “You must always act in the fear of the Lord, with faithfulness and an undivided heart” He said that in vs 7 and 9. 

What is so encouraging and challenging to me about King J here in these passages, there are so many of us who don’t respond the way he did.  He responded humbly and ready to move forward in God’s will.  He didn’t make excuses on why certain things should be done or why he wasn’t following the Lord.  He listened and then obeyed right away.  How often am I guilty of talking myself into why I did things a certain way or why I am not walking in the Lord’s will at the time because I want to do what I want to do?  King J got the news and set about changing what he was doing and what was going on in the entire kingdom.

After this a few kingdoms declared war on King  J and he was told that more armies were coming.  In chapter 20 it says he was terrified and he begged the Lord for guidance and commanded that everyone begin fasting.  People came to Jerusalem from everywhere because they wanted to seek the Lord’s help.

King J stands in front of the people and says

“Lord, the God of our ancestors, are you not the God who is in heaven? You rule over all the kingdoms of the nations. Power and might are in your hand, and no one can withstand you.⁷ Our God, did you not drive out the inhabitants of this land before your people Israel and give it forever to the descendants of Abraham your friend? ⁸ They have lived in it and have built in it a sanctuary for your Name, saying, ⁹ ‘If calamity comes upon us, whether the sword of judgment, or plague or famine, we will stand in your presence before this temple that bears your Name and will cry out to you in our distress, and you will hear us and save us.’

I love so much about this heart wrenching real prayer.  He was humble and brought back what King J knew was true about God, what He had already done in the past.  And then in the end the TRUST in knowing that no matter what we see or have happen YOU WILL SAVE US.  As the armies got closer and the fighting seemed to be close at hand….

¹⁴ Then the Spirit of the Lord came on Jahaziel son of Zechariah, the son of Benaiah, the son of Jeiel, the son of Mattaniah, a Levite and descendant of Asaph, as he stood in the assembly.

¹⁵ He said: “Listen, King Jehoshaphat and all who live in Judah and Jerusalem! This is what the Lord says to you: ‘Do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God’s. ¹⁶ Tomorrow march down against them. They will be climbing up by the Pass of Ziz, and you will find them at the end of the gorge in the Desert of Jeruel.¹⁷ You will not have to fight this battle. Take up your positions; stand firm and see the deliverance the Lord will give you, Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Go out to face them tomorrow, and the Lord will be with you.’”

They are told not to be afraid twice and that they will not have to even fight.  The Lord would be with them.  Now here’s where I would’ve liked to have had a front row seat….

²⁰ Early in the morning they left for the Desert of Tekoa. As they set out, Jehoshaphat stood and said, “Listen to me, Judah and people of Jerusalem! Have faith in the Lord your God and you will be upheld; have faith in his prophets and you will be successful.” ²¹ After consulting the people, Jehoshaphat appointed men to sing to the Lord and to praise him for the splendor of his^[c] holiness as they went out at the head of the army, saying:

²² As they began to sing and praise, the Lord set ambushes against the men of Ammon and Moab and Mount Seir who were invading Judah, and they were defeated.

Can you imagine the singers dancing and shouting and no one fighting and the Lord himself set ambushes to fight God’s enemies.  They all returned and were overjoyed because they had been given victory by God, from their enemies.

When I think about how amazing this experience must have been, I can’t discount how I’ve seen God do amazing things in my life where He has done all the work and battled for me and I have just been changed through it.  This journey I am on is one of them.  I am thankful that God stands and fights and that He has promised to take down my enemies and all I have been asked to do is believe.

My mom was looking through her summer Bible study while she was here todayand sharing with me where she read verses or quotes that made her think of me.  She read me this one from a book by Oswald Chambers quoted by F. Bruce and I thought, yes guys – that is my heart’s desire.

“My goal is God Himself, not joy, nor peace, Nor even blessing, but Himself, my God; ‘Tis His to lead me there, not mine, but His – ‘At any cost, dear Lord, by any road.'”

Here are some ways you can pray for me:

• Pray that my fatigue will not increase and I am asking God to fight against it and allow me to press forward in what He’s called me to 
• Pray for good sleep in the next few weeks before school
• Pray that I am focused on what I need to do so I feel ready to begin
• Pray that in these last 4 sessions of radiation that the Lord eliminates what remains – only God!
• Pray that I am given God appointments the final days I’m at CARTI here to honor Him and share His glory

Bless you warriors!

It has been a busy but crazy few days.  I am thankful because I down to single digits for treatment left.  It is also the reality that I am down to less days to target those specific tumors with radiation.  I am completely trusting the Lord to remove these tumors completely.  I have 7 days left….7! Can you believe it?  When we started with 31 it seemed like it would last forever and here we are about to finish up.  As I started thinking about 7, I was really focused on the fact that 7 is God’s perfect number.  Then I really thought, why not take a Bible verse for each day to claim for that treatment as we finish up?!

I know I have an army beside, in front of, behind me who will pray with me these promises and Truths for each day:

Wednesday – Isaiah 53:5 “And by His stripes we are healed.”

Thursday – Exodus 15:26 ” I am the Lord that Heals you.”

Friday – Exodus 23:25-26 “I will take sickness away from the midst of you and the number of your days I will fulfill.”

Monday – Psalm 107:20 “I sent my Word and healed you and delivered you from your destruction.”

Tuesday – Psalm 103:3 “I heal all diseases.”

Wednesday – Ephesians 6:3 “I want it to be well with you and I want you to live long on the earth.”

Thursday – Matthew 4:23 “I heal all manner of sickness and all manner of disease.” 

Thank you everyone for walking this journey with me and standing firm on God’s Word with me.  I am Blessed.

We have so enjoyed the opportunities to spend time with people as they have brought us dinner the last few days .  It has been so great to catch up, laugh and see wonderful caring people at the house.

We were blessed with a restful weekend.  I went and got new glasses!  This was a big deal because for the last long time – who knows how long, I’ve been duck taping my glasses together because I didn’t want to go get glasses.  I decided that the duck tape needed to go and I went with my favorite soccer color – blue! Was also blessed by Rhonda McKinney with a new hat – perfect right? Where would we be without HOPE?

We were able to drop the girls off at soccer camp at the University of Central Arkansas.  I was thankful they had other girls from their teams there so they weren’t going alone, the hugs I got were a blessing too!  Ready to coach again….Hard to believe that in 3 short years it will be their turn…. where does time go?

We also had family drop in and visit for a few hours.  Wasn’t long, but it was so great to be able to see my cousins Angie and Mike and their sweet little ones.  They dropped through on their way home to Peoria, IL.  We were able to visit and then had to go Chick-fil-a to see Garrett at work.  My parents had just come to town so we were able to see them there too and hang out until it was time for bed!  Thanks Mike and Angie for making the stop -so good to see you guys and thanks for joining us on our nightly walk! And thanks to the teens (Anna, Caleb and Zach) we know who were nice enough to take all the pics!

So yes, it’s been a busy few days for us!  But, what a blessing.  Loving my time with each person that I get to spend time with!

AHHHH can I just rest in this today?  What PEACE here – If God is on my team, no one else stands a chance!  What’s awesome about this? I know He and I are on the same team and so I can have JOY and HOPE that bubbles over.  Thank you Jesus. Thank you.  I love being able to stare at this everyday in my kitchen be reminded of the fact that nothing is ever wasted.  God has a plan and purpose in everything I go through.  Bless – what PEACE!

In reading the end of Romans 8 today I was ready to battle.  I have shared with you my desire to pray for you all especially in treatment.  As I pray each day, I really desire to seek the Lord’s will as I am bold and ask for Him to intercede for me and for others.

²⁶ In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. ²⁷ And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

²⁸ And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who^[i] have been called according to his purpose.

What a blessing to know that the very Spirit of God intercedes for us as we pray.  We don’t need to “worry” that we pray “good enough” or have the “right words,” we have been given help through the Spirit.  Paul goes on to remind us that if we are under Christ we have nothing else to worry about.  We are under the banner of the maker of the universe!

³¹ What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? ³² He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 

When I stop and really think about the fact that God Himself was willing to allow His own son to die… for me…. for you.  That’s mind blowing.  And because God was willing to do something that hard, for us -He gave us His son – we can rest in knowing that His desire is FOR us.

³³ Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. ³⁴ Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. ³⁵ Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? ³⁶ As it is written:

³⁷ No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. ³⁸ For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,^[k] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, ³⁹ neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

No matter what we face going forward.  We can claim these verses and know that when we put our trust in Christ, choosing to live our lives for Him, NOTHING we do or that happens in the world will ever separate us from what Jesus already accomplished on the cross.  Remember that.  Don’t allow failure or others speak the lies of “God could never love you or use you….”  NOT TRUE.  You have a purpose and God has a plan for your life that is unique and special.  Ask Him to show you and live faithfully for Him, you’ll see Him work in ways you never thought possible.

Here are some other ways you guys can pray for me:

• I am coming off of my steroids slowly… so, I know it will mean less “extra” energy – prayers for my body to adjust to this and also against any swelling that may want to happen – I still want energy!
• Prayers I can get all these toxins out of my body as I am being hit by them daily
• Prayers for me as I start focusing on what I have going on in the next couple of weeks – school/soccer
• Prayers for good vision still and no head “Aches”
• Prayers for clear scans when they get scheduled!

It has been a really busy few days.  So still doing radiation everyday at 11:30am.  Love my people up there.  Blessed to see some “graduate” and move on and now even today, the reminder that this battle goes on.  There were new faces up there today just starting and I can remember wondering the first few days, what have I gotten myself in to.   I’m praying for these first timers or second first timers.  It’s a hard battle and the longer the battle goes, the harder it is to BE STILL and Believe.

I want to thank all of you again for allowing me the opportunity to pray with and for you.  It allows me focus and direction in the morning, during treatment, when the Lord reminds me during the day and at night when I am up.  I have been truly blessed to bring these requests to the Lord in confidence and in battle against Satan.  I have to write everything down…or forget it I won’t remember!

We have had a super busy week.  It sort of hit me this week that school starts soon!  I feel like the kids… course I’ve always been a “I could do without school messing up what I’m doing” kind of person.  But, this is life.  School must begin and everyday I take a link off of my cancer battle chain I am basically saying – school is one day closer- at least that’s what the kids say.

I knew that I wanted to get into the soccer office in the field house.  Last year, didn’t have a whole lot of time to think about how the office could be or should be.  Coach Friday, who shares the office with me, said “do whatever you want I don’t care”.  So I did.  I roped my father-in-law and my family, plus Nikki Funk into getting up there for a couple days and cleaning it out, throwing things away and getting it ready for the year.  And I LOVE IT!!!! Not all the way done, but it is soooo much better.  I left room for more trophies and It was good for my WHAT’s NEXT thought process, because now….I’m a little more ok with school starting.  Let’s not talk about my classroom yet 🙂 . hat a blessing it was to meet them.

 I was also able to meet the Gomez family in my renovations.  They sold me a bench to put in the office and we shared our relationship with the Lord and fellow battles with cancer.  What a blessing it was to meet them.

I was also able to get to see some of my club girls. So, I coach at the high school, but also have been a club soccer coach forever. This year I coach girls that are sophomores and juniors  – YIKES! So I have some girls from my high school team and then I have these other amazing ladies that I get to pour into and meet that I just love.  It made it interesting for me this year as a high school coach watching them play.  I have to admit I was coaching them in my head, under my breath and wondering why they just did what they did and me saying “oh that was a good ball…” It’s fun to to just enjoy the game sometimes.

Besides hanging out with these ladies, I was blessed by so many others.  At treatment this week…since I did the bald thing, I thought maybe I should look into a wig or something for school.  I hadn’t really considered that my hair would be in shock for awhile and who knows when it will decide to grow back.  So I made a trip at CARTI to their wig and other hair stuff room and I met these sweet teens.    What a blessing that they choose to volunteer up there and try and help those of us who have no idea what’s going on!  Ella Beth and Kate are students at Little Rock Christian Academy and blessed me as we all laughed at what was happening up on my head!  Did I get a wig – no, not yet, but I got a cute scarf!

I was also blessed to see my sweet warrior friend Sarah who is also battling brain cancer and she and I share the same Spirit of the Lord so we just are soul sisters every time we get the chance to speak or see each other.  In all her deals she, blessed me by knowing I may need a softer head and gave me some products to help me with the skin damage of radiation.  Thanks Girl!

Nathan was super excited to get a special breakfast dinner from Ms Vaughan, who works at our church and her parents.  He has really enjoyed watching people stop by and of course seeing what other people cook.  Seriously,  been so blessed to be fed by so many people.  It really is a highlight of my day to just spend time talking with people who are praying for us and investing in my health.  THANK YOU WARRIORS!

I am super excited to get my artwork from my good friend Sarah Henry of Redeemed Home Goods.  I asked her to paint what Abbey had done and I cannot wait to pick this piece up from her and get it hung up!

“I will cry to God Most High, to God who accomplishes ALL THINGS FOR ME.” Psalm 57:2

I have to admit, I am reading a lot of books right now.  Some are devotionals, some are words of scripture, some are from people who have walked in the dark valleys, some are daily Biblical challenges and I am enjoying each one.  As I read through one of these Bible Studies it took me to the book of Job.  And I was very thankful for the time spent in there.  The book of Job has always been a very amazing exchange to me and here where I am now, I was further reminded that as I pray very fervently over each request for others and for myself that we are in a very REAL battle.  Satan desires to take us down and out and that is the Truth.  BUT GOD…..people!  We have GOD, El Elyon – THE MOST HIGH with US!  And in reading these very familiar passages to me again, in this time, God really affirmed and spoke to me.

Job 1:6-12 

⁶ One day the angels^[a] came to present themselves before the Lord, and Satan^[b]also came with them. ⁷ The Lord said to Satan, “Where have you come from?”

Satan answered the Lord, “From roaming throughout the earth, going back and forth on it.”

I am not going to assume we all know what’s going on here.  It is believed that Job may be the first book of the Bible written and Job was an upright God worshipping, believing person.  He was very successful and had a blessed family.  Everything was going good for Job.  Satan was created as a beautiful angel of God – who CHOSE to rebel against God-becoming an enemy of God.

⁸ Then the Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil.”

⁹ “Does Job fear God for nothing?” Satan replied. ¹⁰ “Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has? You have blessed the work of his hands, so that his flocks and herds are spread throughout the land. ¹¹ But now stretch out your hand and strike everything he has, and he will surely curse you to your face.”

So as Satan is roaming around the earth, the Lord points out Job.  Can you imagine having the Lord say, “There is no one on earth like him…” For the Lord to see Job and his faithfulness and highlight it…wow!  Satan comes back with – you’ve blessed him of course he’s going to serve you and not curse you.  But, if you changed that and made life hard for him, he would change his heart’s focus.

¹² The Lord said to Satan, “Very well, then, everything he has is in your power, but on the man himself do not lay a finger.”

Then Satan went out from the presence of the Lord.

So here’s an amazing TRUTH we cannot forget.  God is in control and ONLY HE is Most High.  Satan has to ask permission to mess with Job.  He has to go to God and ASK that he is allowed to get involved in Job’s life.  For me this is a TRUTH we have to understand.  Satan cannot get involved without the Lord allowing him …. Bless!

The passage goes on to say:

Job 2:1-10 

2 On another day the angels^[a] came to present themselves before the Lord, and Satan also came with them to present himself before him. ² And the Lord said to Satan, “Where have you come from?”

Satan answered the Lord, “From roaming throughout the earth, going back and forth on it.”

³ Then the Lord said to Satan, “Have you considered my servant Job? There is no one on earth like him; he is blameless and upright, a man who fears God and shuns evil. And he still maintains his integrity, though you incited me against him to ruin him without any reason.”

⁴ “Skin for skin!” Satan replied. “A man will give all he has for his own life. ⁵ But now stretch out your hand and strike his flesh and bones, and he will surely curse you to your face.”

⁶ The Lord said to Satan, “Very well, then, he is in your hands; but you must spare his life.”

The Lord allows Satan now to touch Job’s body because Satan believes that in this moment, Job will curse God and turn his back on the Lord.

⁷ So Satan went out from the presence of the Lord and afflicted Job with painful sores from the soles of his feet to the crown of his head. ⁸ Then Job took a piece of broken pottery and scraped himself with it as he sat among the ashes.

⁹ His wife said to him, “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!”

¹⁰ He replied, “You are talking like a foolish^[b] woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?”

In all this, Job did not sin in what he said.

EEEEKKKKKK!  So excited to finally be able to write!  So much has gone on the last couple of days… and then nothing has gone on at the same time!

Biggest news probably:  I chopped off all my hair and shaved it all off.  I really wondered if I would have to make this decision or not.  I heard phrases like “your hair will thin where we are shooting you with radiation.” “you could lose some hair…”  “we just have to wait and see..”  Well we waited and we saw and I just couldn’t risk being slapped with an arrest warrant because clumps of my hair were found in some crime area or on a dead body.  It was a daily battle: me vs my hair.  I decided to be done with it.

So it was time.  I have to say, I struggled a bit with this idea.  I like the idea of pulling my hair up and being able to look like a “woman” and that includes doing my hair.  But, as Scott finished getting the rest of my hair off tonight, I just told the Lord “this is your plan and you have a purpose and darn it – this is the head you made and you said it was good.  So, let’s do this. Be glorified even in this!”

We had the most blessed weekend away at Lake Ouachita with the family.  Our summer travel plans had to be changed and I decided that it would be nice to be able to just go to the lake for a couple of days and relax.  It was a sweet weekend.  The kids had a good time and we were just able to just “be” without other things going on.  The good news/weird news is that we didn’t have great cell service blessing/harder living LOL so that really through all of us off.  Haven’t we just become too dependent on technology???!!!!  I wanted to blog 100 times and had to be positioned hanging with one foot off the deck and my hand on my head to get a bar going…so I just really tried to post a couple things at the 1 min opening I was given on my phone – ha!  So instead I spent time reading and really just soaking in the Lord for a couple hours every morning.  Loved my time with Him.  One of the blessings through this journey is being able to see my kids laugh as I laugh, dig into God’s Word and live to trust Him in EVEN in this.  There is no greater joy for me – no soccer win, no academic achievement, NOTHING will ever mean more to me than what I am seeing from them.  Praise God!  Here are some of our fun memories:

Was blessed by many people the last few days!  Can I just remember to always get photos!  One of my sweet girls Hannah from my club team came up to get bracelets and waited on me to surprise me after treatment Friday.  Best hugs are from my girls.  Her family has been such a blessing and faithful prayer warriors for me.  Very thankful for their joy and love.

I had a great surprise today.  I got a message from a guy who used to ref make games and kept me in line when I thought “the game” was so important – kids were probably 10 Ha!  Anyway, Keith was always an excellent ref and I enjoyed his interaction with the players and me.  I met up with he and his wife Terri.  Here’s how the Lord works: Terri and I have never met, yet she knew one day, God told her to make me a quilt.  It is so awesome!  She has taken some of the verses off of my blogs and stitched them onto the quilt.  Today we got to hug and talk about what all the Lord is doing and I was blessed.  God is so great and good!

The Chumleys came over and brought us dinner.  Nikki and I have worked on soccer club stuff before and we are blessed to go to the same church.  Also, Kate is my little artist- and future hornet :).  Look at what she brought me!  So awesome!  Love it!

“FOR FROM HIM AND THROUGH HIM AND TO HIM ARE ALL THINGS. TO HIM BE THE GLORY FOREVER. AMEN”  Romans 11:36

In the last few days I have read so many things!  It’s hard for me to really hone in on what the Lord would want me to share…. His Word is just too amazing!

But, David…Ahhhh he is my kind of person.  All out worship and dedicated to fight for whatever the Lord calls him to.  Was he perfect, no. Infact he disobeyed God quite a few times. But, he came back to him humbled and ready to follow the Lord’s next steps.

He had brought back the Ark of the Covenent and was faithful to do the things the Lord required by His people to pay for their sin.  David loved music.  Of course we remember that he played the Harp even at a young age, but as you read through Pslams you can see his passion and desire to worship through song was evident.

1 Chronicles 16:41-43

⁴⁰ to present burnt offerings to the Lord on the altar of burnt offering regularly, morning and evening, in accordance with everything written in the Law of the Lord, which he had given Israel. ⁴¹ With them were Heman and Jeduthun and the rest of those chosen and designated by name to give thanks to the Lord, “for his love endures forever.” ⁴² Heman and Jeduthun were responsible for the sounding of the trumpets and cymbals and for the playing of the other instruments for sacred song. The sons of Jeduthun were stationed at the gate.

⁴³ Then all the people left, each for their own home, and David returned home to bless his family.

I love that David understood that he was a dad and husband and he had an obligation to BLESS his family-even while doing important things, like ruling a kingdom.  I imagine David going home enjoying his family, kissing everyone good night and walking aroud the palace.  As he gazes out over the kingdom a thought occurs to him and he summons Nathan the prophet.  David shares with Nathan that he thinks it’s not right that he is in such a palace and that Ark of the Lord’s covenant is in a tent – something big needs to be built.  Nathan tells David to do whatever he thinks should be done because the Lord is with him.

The Lord appears to Nathan later that same night to tell Nathan something else… The Lord tells Nathan …

David’s response is one of humility and honoring of the Lord.  WHO AM I that you would do all of this?  It wasn’t about David ever, his heart was focused on what the Lord desired and he never questioned it.  He knew the greatness of God and trusted and submitted to His will, not David’s will. 

²³ “And now, Lord, let the promise you have made concerning your servant and his house be established forever. Do as you promised, ²⁴ so that it will be established and that your name will be great forever. Then people will say, ‘The Lord Almighty, the God over Israel, is Israel’s God!’ And the house of your servant David will be established before you.

²⁵ “You, my God, have revealed to your servant that you will build a house for him. So your servant has found courage to pray to you. ²⁶ You, Lord, are God! You have promised these good things to your servant. ²⁷ Now you have been pleased to bless the house of your servant, that it may continue forever in your sight; for you, Lord, have blessed it, and it will be blessed forever.”

God is faithful and David just declares it here.  Do as you say and people will say these things…because it WILL happen.  I won’t see it with my own eyes, but this is what WILL happen because God is trustworthy and David knew it.  When God promises, He always fulfills. 

David went on after this to secure the kingdom and battle many other kings.  We are told twice in 18:6 and 18:13 that the Lord made David victorious wherever he went.  David followed the Lord’s will and heart and went on to do what the Lord called him to.  He never once questioned the Lord’s plan or why he wouldn’t be the one to build this huge massive house of worship.  He trusted the Lord’s plan and followed His will – and the Lord made David victorious.  

I love the word VICTORY! Victory is promised for those who choose to follow and obey the Lord, no matter what our hearts may think or desire.  We must choose to follow after the Lord and submit completely to His will for us.  It’s not easy.  We will want to revolt sometimes and do what we want to do.  But Victory is at stake here my friends.  And the Lord desires and promises to give it to us…

As I think about the journey that I have been on.  I could ask the Lord why can’t I sit around and build something pretty, but instead he’s called me to battle.  All I want is to say to the Lord what David said…

“Who am I, Lord God, and what is my family, that you have brought me this far? ¹⁷ And as if this were not enough in your sight, my God, you have spoken about the future of the house of your servant. You, Lord God, have looked on me as though I were the most exalted of men.”

Who am I….Who am I … that you have looked on me as though I were the most exalted of men?”  Bless you Lord – Bless you!

Here are some ways to continue to pray:

• Praise – everytime I am asked about how I am feeling, there seems to be some surprise that I am feeling pretty great.  So praise God people!
• Prayers that this radiation and chemo is targeting these tumors and killing them. My warriors are there battling and I am claiming VICTORY
• I am coming to the end of summer… eeek… haven’t spent much time on school stuff and I need to get going…so prayers for me to to focus on what I need to do for that and for my soccer teams.  Love these kids
• Prayers that the Lord will continue to hold me and just shine through.  Nothing encourages me and enables me to battle like hearing about how the Lord is working in people’s lives.  
• Continue to pray for the toxins to exit my body and for great energy – still feeling good!
• This week Scott is taking off to spend time at the house – so pray for great family moments together

Oh my goodness I had a blessed weekend!  A dear friend of mine flew in from Virginia to spend the weekend with me and we just talked and talked all weekend.  Her name is Kate and she and I both studied abroad in Monterrey, Mexico our Junior year of college for a semester.  She was in my wedding party and we were fortunate to see each other last summer when we went to DC and hit the east coast a bit.

I love that she is my sister in Christ and not just a roommate.  Course what we discovered, she has a better memory than me.  I’m going to blame the radiation…don’t know if that’s legit or not… but, it’s amazing as we looked at photos, how she remembered everyone’s names.  I couldn’t believe it!

We were able to go get a pedicure together and just “rest” together.  Nathan really enjoyed getting to know Kate and the two of them made slime together and he talked her ears off!  Time went so fast… but, what a blessing to have time to just sit and be reminded of memories and to just talk about what the Lord is doing in our lives.  Aren’t those just the best days?

So the older three left for church camp Saturday as well.  I had hoped to go this year and chaperone, but the Lord just had a different plan for me.  I have grown to love all the students at church like they were my own.  It was so great this year at school to be able to see so many of them as they were in my class, or came to my class to say hi.  Teens are the best.  You want an anti aging regiment?  Hang out with teens.  I have spent almost 20 years with teens at churches and there’s nothing else I would rather do.

Sunday night the house was quiet.  Only Nathan and Scott.  So we did our nightly walking around the block and just talking about how much has been going on and the many blessings we have received from so many of you.  I asked Nathan to take a picture of Scott and I …. the sunset was amazing!  God continually shouts to the world … “I’m here, don’t miss me… you won’t ever regret choosing me over everything else…”  And somehow, some of us choose to ignore Him and reject Him.

Well I have to admit.  I may reach my record for not washing my hair… haven’t gotten there yet…but losing hair is easier when it’s dry than when it was wet. Pretty much every time I brush my hair one stroke my brush looks like what’s below.  It’s crazy.   I did read that apparently as a blonde I have more hair follicles than any other hair color.  So it says I have 150,000 follicles …. so I have some hope that maybe I won’t lose all of it – ha.  I also discovered that in my big bald spot that I have some very short hair left…looks like a tattoo or something – but it’s in the shape of a “V” – so I’m claiming that means “Victory!” in Jesus name.

Was super blessed to be able to head down to Collide Camp and see Abbey, Ashton and Garrett and EVERY other awesome teen there.  We missed the ministry time so we just hung out and saw where they were staying and just watched them having fun with their friends.  Blessed to spend the weekend there.  Would you please pray for the pastor that is there from Tampa.  His daughter who is 14 is also battling cancer.  Her name is Josie.  And pray for lives to be transformed.  Thank you.

Here are some photos we took while we were there:

“The Lord has heard my plea; the Lord will answer my prayer.”

Psalm 6:9

As I opened up to read my Bible…I am telling you what.  With all the battles and warriors in the Old Testament I have a completely new perspective.  They were armed, prepared, had the proper equipment and the most important key to their success as they waged war was, did they listen to what God told them to do and did they trust completely that He would deliver them.  I just cheer now as I read… yes battle hard, you got this, fight warriors, fight.  And when God gets the angels involved I just get goose bumps because my warrior angels assigned to my case are valiant fighters and I can see them just using their bows and arrows taking out my tumors bit by bit.

In Acts Paul was still in prison and was in front of King Agrippa.  Paul began his defense by explaining about his past and that he himself was a zealous Jew until Jesus himself spoke to him and blinded him, so that he might come to believe that Jesus is who he said he is.  So here’s what Paul tells the king… (Acts 26:6-7)

“Now I am on trial because of my HOPE in the fulfillment of God’s promise made to our ancestors.  In fact, that is why the twelve tries of Israel zealously worship God night and day, and they share the same HOPE I have.  Yet, your magesty, they accuse me for having this HOPE.”

Paul was explaining to Aggripa that he was on trial because he knew the fulfillment that he had looked for as a Jew had transpired.  The HOPE that everyone had longed to see.  People had been waiting for the Messiah since Adam and Eve  sinned in the garden and God promised again through Abraham – a Savior – the solution to the gap that was cut between God and people.  Paul didn’t believe Jesus was it, because he didn’t want to believe Jesus was it.  It took Jesus himself bringing Paul to his knees in order for him to understand and accept that Jesus was THE long awaited Messiah.  Paul goes on to tell Agrippa, Festus, Govenor Bernice and others ….

“BUT GOD (my favorite thing…) has protected me right up to this present time SO I CAN TESTIFY to everyone, fro the least to the greatest.  I teach nothing except what the prophets and Moses said would happen – that the Messiah would suffer and be the first to rise from the dead, and in this way announe God’s light to Jews and Gentiles alike.”  Acts 26:22-23

Paul knew what his mission was.  He knew why he was in chains and he had the birthright in order to be able to appeal and see the top people.  The question was how would these top leaders respond to the Truth of the gospel?  I wish I could say they were persuaded……

“Suddenly, Festus shouted, “Paul, you are insane.  Too much study has made you crazy!”  But Paul replied, “I am not insane Most Excellent Festus.  What I am saying is the sober truth.  And King Agrippa knows about these things.  I speak boldly for I am sure these events are all familiar to him, for they were not done in a corner!  King Agrippa, do you believe the prophets, I know you do…” Agrippa interrupted him. “Do you think you can persuade me to become a Christian so quickly?”  Paul replied, “Whether quickly or not, I pray to God that both you and everyone here in this audience might become the same as I am, except for these chains.”  Acts 26:24-29

When I look at the boldness with which Paul spoke to some very important people, they had power to decide what to do with him next.  These were men of highest importance, yet he had the boldness to proclaim Truth.  He desired that these men and everyone listening would come to believe the Truth that he was living.  The verses that come after this tell us the men all got up and hadn’t really considered the message that had been given.  Truth fell on deaf ears and they missed the greatest gift ever given.  These guys were so busy doing their “jobs” that they didn’t take time to consider WHAT Paul was actually saying.  He wasn’t trying to defend himself, he set out to proclaim Jesus to ALL that would listen and consider what it all meant.  He desired that people would hear about Jesus, consider Jesus, accept Jesus and live and proclaim Jesus.   

As I think about Paul, I feel where he’s at.  I started this blog with a picture of peace.  Paul had peace in each and every situation he faced.  No matter the consequences, he was set on sharing the Truth with anyone who would listen.  His desire was for the Lord to use him to bring people to Christ.  Remember Paul could’ve stayed with fellow Christians, gone other places to proclaim the Truth, but instead he knew he had been called to take the harder road.  He was at peace.

I thank the Lord a million times a day that He has filled me with His peace.  I know that what He has called me to isn’t easy.  I feel pretty confident, I wouldn’t have chosen it.  Even though I have prayed some pretty bold things lately.  But, I have seen him work in so many ways, that looking at it now, I wouldn’t have wanted to miss out on what all He has done.  So all Praise to Him!

I was joking around a bit with my radiation doctor today.  I told him that the first few weeks after my seizure and before we started battling the tumors, I would cry more than normal.  I’m not a huge crier.  But, one of the tumors is close to my emotional part of my brain.  He was explaining could be what I was doing then versus now.  And I told him, “No, I have done an hour and half of Bible study everyday and I used to just cry as I read through what the Lord was showing me.  Now, I’m reading the same amount, I am amazed and it still hits me but, I’m not needing a box of kleenex anymore.”  So we are going to see how my warrior angels have battled these tumors in this area, because I think they’ve knocked them back from that part of my brain and God has already removed some of the tumors that used to be there.  He smiled at me and said, “ok…well we will see.”  I love the people at CARTI – so fun.

Here are some ways you all can be praying for me:

• Continued energy and good sleep at night
• Pray that the tumors are being targeted well
• Continue to pray for the toxins to be flushed out of my body and for my body to respond well to all the medication (so far I have been blessed)
• Good lab reports this week again
• Pray that as I am praying for others on the table…everything comes to mind quickly and that the Lord hears and answers these prayers
• Pray that my oldest three are challenged and grow in the Lord the last couple days of camp

Going to write just a quicker blog today.  So many wonderful things going on today that I just know I need to give God the Glory!  So many amazing stories where I have heard about people persevering during difficult trials and seeing God just do amazing things.  I have also been so touched by so many of you who are struggling or love someone dearly who is struggling.  I am blessed by each prayer request and I consider it a privilege to bring your burdens before the Lord.  My time on the table goes so quickly because I am worshiping and praying for each request that I have been given.  My angels got the treatment and I am just blessed, blessed, blessed to spend time in prayer.

Was very blessed (how many times can I say this word?) this morning by my neighbor Gala Tallent who picked me up and took me to treatment so Scott could start his day in Little Rock for work.  Just as the Lord likes to do, He had my machine down so that we were going to be running late…and we got to meet our new sister and friend Dorthy Rogers, who is a caregiver of her husband who was in there before getting treatment.  We had the opportunity to visit for close to an hour and just share stories, challenges and our HOPE in the Lord.

It was so amazing to be with Gala today.  Listen, this lady is a warrior beyond warrior for the Lord.  Course if you know her, or have met her, her testimony of walking with the Lord is just so amazing and I love to hear about how the Lord walked with her in difficult times and then used her for so many things.  Gala spends almost all of her free time ministering to homeless camps and keeping up with individuals battling big things.  To hear how the Lord has used her and her friends is just an amazing confirmation to the Lord’s hand and desire to use us to minister to people most people don’t give a thought to.  I completely forgot to take any pics today with her because we were just so engaged in what we were talking about… but here she is with her husband Tommy ministering to others. (I stole this off her page lol) . Also pray for her Monday, she is having a procedure and I know she doesn’t want to be down from her ministry very long.  Thank you.

We were visited by Scott’s cousins Marcy and Shelly.  They stopped by for a couple of hours to check in on me and Ann, and we got visit about what is going on in their lives.  It’s so great to be able to just visit and share time with so many loving people.  We were given a wonderful dinner from the Cicero Family as well!

It has been a very cool and pleasant night tonight.  That I’m sitting outside on my deck and it feels perfect.  Love these little surprises that we get every once in a while.  Nathan was sweet to offer to walk with me around the block.  I think he enjoys “babysitting” me.

As I sit every morning and study the Word… I am just so humbled and blessed to be with the Lord.  These two verses of Psalms 4 are truly, truly how I feel, walk and want to live.  I have joy, I am filled with peace and I feel safe in the Father’s arms.  I love that it says “let your face smile on us, Lord…”  His face is the only thing I see in treatment and it makes ME smile….and I smiled bigger today knowing He was smiling on me 🙂

In studying Acts 24 today and following Paul as he is heading closer and closer to Rome, I am continually comforted and confident as I see how much the Lord took care of Paul and gave him opportunities to tell others about what Jesus had done for them on the cross.  His journey has made me a stronger warrior and given me continual hope that I am very thankful for.

So if you remember, Paul was moved at night and protected from those that wanted to kill him.  They had to wait 5 days for the high priest to show up with all of his people and begin the trial.  They tried to present an argument that was full of lies and deception to convince Felix, the governor that this guy Paul should be dealt with harshly.

Felix allowed Paul to speak ….. after speaking against everything the high priest had said, he said this….

 ¹⁴“But I admit that I follow the Way, which they call a cult. I worship the God of our ancestors, and I firmly believe the Jewish law and everything written in the prophets. ¹⁵ I have the same hope in God that these men have, that he will raise both the righteous and the unrighteous. ¹⁶ Because of this, I always try to maintain a clear conscience before God and all people.

Paul confirmed that he believed in the Old Testament law the same as his accusers and then went on to explain further why he was on trial.  Paul was bold, truthful and ready to stand before the people who wanted him dead and before the governor who had all authority to punish him.  Ahhhh Felix……

²² At that point Felix, who was quite familiar with the Way, adjourned the hearing and said, “Wait until Lysias, the garrison commander, arrives. Then I will decide the case.” ²³ He ordered an officer^[d] to keep Paul in custody but to give him some freedom and allow his friends to visit him and take care of his needs.

I think at this point, something about Paul intriqued Felix.  He basically pushed the religious leaders aside and decided there was something about this guy Paul that he wanted to know more about.  And we see this in the following verses….

²⁴ A few days later Felix came back with his wife, Drusilla, who was Jewish. Sending for Paul, they listened as he told them about faith in Christ Jesus. ²⁵ As he reasoned with them about righteousness and self-control and the coming day of judgment, Felix became frightened. “Go away for now,” he replied. “When it is more convenient, I’ll call for you again.” ²⁶ He also hoped that Paul would bribe him, so he sent for him quite often and talked with him.

Felix is so interested in what Paul is all about that he brings his Jewish wife to hear what Paul has to say.  Paul was bold, holding nothing back and giving Felix and his wife everything they needed to be able to know Jesus and make a decision about Him.  But in verse 26 we see his heart.  He was hoping for money from Paul.  “Hey Paul, give me some money and I’ll let you go…. you keep talking about Jesus….it’s interesting.  I like what you have to say….I’ve given you some freedoms…your friends get to visit and hang out with you…life could be worse.  Hmmmm Jesus.  Interesting.  Not ready to make a decision about this yet….keep talking…. what I have to change the way I live?  What my life and focus would be different?  Hmmmmm  

²⁷ After two years went by in this way, Felix was succeeded by Porcius Festus. And because Felix wanted to gain favor with the Jewish people, he left Paul in prison.

After two years of investment by Paul, Felix chose power and prestige over a saving faith in Christ.  I bet that broke Paul’s heart.  To think about all the conversations, probably some laughter, maybe even meals together and in the end Felix walked away from knowing the Lord.  But, that’s how it is with the Lord.  He never will force himself on anyone, it is an individual choice that each person must make for themselves.  The decision is costly.  Saving faith on earth may cost you friends, jobs, prestige or other popular things.  But, that same faith will give you an eternal home with Jesus himself.  Felix walked away from this.  He chose earthly glory and power and walked away from the Truth and would spend eternity away from Jesus separated from Him in constant torture.  

This is a hard truth for many of us. To know that we may invest years into a person and they choose their own way… is heart breaking to think about.  But, in the end we are not responsible to make choices for people, only to be faithful to share and pray.  The Lord desires for EVERY PERSON to come to the knowledge of the Truth.  (1 Timothy 2:4)

Have you ever known someone who chose this road and walked away from the Truth? I know talking to my sweet neighbor Gala today as we shared stories about the Lord she had a story to tell me about a young man she dearly loves that she has shared Jesus with many times, but isn’t willing to cross the line and choose Jesus over the life he is currently living.  We are praying for him…will you join us? 

Listen faith is a choice we make.  I don’t know all of the answers and I never will…until that day I see Jesus face to face and I just run and embrace Him.  But, I have made a choice in my life…I made it long ago.  Nothing in this life will EVER be before Jesus.  He called me long ago and I knew it.  I trust Him EVEN WHEN I am in this right now.  Paul trusted Him while he sat in prison and used that “hard” time to minister to others and tell others about Jesus.

What is the Lord doing in your life right now that you can use to tell others about Jesus? We have been given the HOPE that the world needs.  Ask Him to build you up and step forward in faith, trusting that He will use you in a mighty way.  Let the face of the Lord SMILE on you today and every day as you share and show the Love of Christ to those who need it!

A couple of awesome things:

The HOPE WARRIOR SHIRTS are ready to order!  So excited to get these out!

DOCS.GOOGLE.COM

Hope Warrior Shirts

These shirts have been designed to show our dear friend, Nicole Inman, our support for her and her message. See below for shirt design. The shirt design can be on four types of shirts. Comfort Color T-shirt Comfort Color Tank Gildan Soft Style T-shirt Gildan Tank Each shirt is $15.00 if ordering 2XL…

ALSO super blessed by this song my brotherMike sent me today.  Could be my theme song.  Turn it up and enjoy it!

PRAYER NEEDS:

• Kids leave tomorrow for church camp, pray for deep times with the Lord 
• Pray for sweet moments with my friend Kate and I this weekend
• Pray that my leg cramps continue to stay away at night
• For the swelling to continue to subside in my face
• For all of the poison to leave my body and for my stomach lining to be protected and not give me issues … found out could be the feelings I’ve been having.  
• Pray for me to get good rest every night and not be restless 

Thank you so much warriors!  You all are encouraging me forward each step of the day!

#hopewarrior

If there was a verse I probably could plaster everywhere for my journey right now Romans 12:12 would be it. 
These are challenging words and commands. Doesn’t say, when you feel like it, or when it’s not too hard or when you want to set an example. It says BE Joyful, BE Patient and BE Faithful. 
So in the middle of affliction and difficulty we are called to rely and wait – to be patient. How can we do that? Mostly we want to throw the towel in and complain because difficulty is hard stuff. We simply cannot see how THIS could be good… ever. I love that the word affliction is sandwiched in between Hope and Prayer. When we are fixed on the Hope we have been given in Christ, we are joy filled people. When we have taken the time to be built up in Prayer by the Lord, no matter what, affliction tries to tear us down, we are solid because he has been faithful to strengthen and prepare us for the battle ahead.
Today ask the Lord to fill you with Hope that He gives… He is faithful and will provide it and so much more! Battle on warriors. #hopewarrior

 This I posted on my Instagram and FB today.  I was really blessed by this passage and just the opportunity to really take it in.  I love it when God teaches me and stretches me.

We were blessed with a great 4th of July.  The kids were gracious enough to stay home and hang with the folks… Ok maybe we told them it would be nice if they did.  Scott took the kids to the neighborhood pool and I was able to catch up with my parents on the phone and then decided I needed to shut my eyes for a quick little nap.  Thankfully when I woke up the kids were still there so my in-laws were gracious enough to take me up to the pool and watch the kids a bit from the shade.

Our street was really patriotic!  Good job neighbors!  We had quite the show of fireworks all around.  The 4th is such a special holiday and I will always cherish the freedoms we enjoy that so many were willing to live and die for and still are today.  So if you are a soldier…thank you for our service!

I mentioned above how my in-laws took me to the pool.  Well, they deserve a standing ovation for all they have done for us the past month.  Clyde has been over here fixing and doing things that I had wanted to get done and Ann has lived here taking the load of caring for things around here.  We certainly couldn’t do all we are doing around here without them!

We were blessed by Melanie Stacey who brought us dinner for the 4th.  She and her husband were Abbey and Ashton’s 4th grade Sunday School teachers at Geyer Springs.  So blessed to hear about their summer travels and just to get a hug from her.

After our 4th adventures I admit I was ready for bed.  I decided to take a bath and wash my hair and get relaxed before bed.  I got out of the bath and started to do what I normally do before bed.  One of the first things is to brush my wet hair!  Now I had been told that I would lose hair where I was getting the radiation treatment…but was expecting another week or so and honestly really hadn’t thought too much about it.  I’ll always remember this now because it was on the 4th….but I was brushing clumps of hair out… I know these moments are hard for many patients…. and I was surprised for a moment, then I got annoyed because it wouldn’t end and then I just decided I didn’t want to brush my hair anymore because there were wet strands just hanging around that didn’t seem to ever end!  So after 5 full brushes of hair, I decided I would look at it in the morning….I was calling it a night!  I took a couple of pics…sorry if it’s weird or maybe even kind of gross…but this is the reality going for me right now and for many cancer patients.

When I got up this morning and my hair was a drier, it was easier for me to brush the hair out and hopefully, maybe come to an end of here’s where I’m getting hit at treatment.  The blessing in all of this… I have been trying to put frankincense where my tumors are and never really knew where they needed to go.  Well now I have nothing in the way and Scott was so kind to roll that oil all over my naked spots on my head!  I have to admit when I was lying on the table today I was really hoping that we aren’t zapping any more pieces of hair away… I can cover the skin now…don’t need a sunburned head!  Thanks TEAM!:)

This morning I woke up and spent time soaking in the word on my deck…love this time.  Abbey and Ashton had to go take their driver’s test.  I didn’t know if they would pass the test…really hadn’t studied as much as I would’ve thought they needed, but I NEED them to pass so they can drive me around when school starts.  So thankful the Lord allowed them both to pass, so now they are practicing so they can chauffeur me around this school year!

After the girls made it home Scott and I headed up for treatment/appts which were going to last most of the day.  And they did.  I was thankful because my machine wasn’t down, but the other one was…so it was very busy in there.  CARTI has some of the sweetest people and we just have a great time being up there laughing and sharing stories.  Course I had to tell them all I was going bald on one side.  HA!

After treatment and lunch we were blessed to visit with my friend Elizabeth, her daughter Lyndsey and Grandma Doyle.  Grandma is going through her own chemo treatment every three weeks and it’s hard on her.  Would you please pray that her final treatments aren’t as hard on her and that they are working just as they should ?  Elizabeth has been such a warrior for me and I just appreciate their family so much. Course we know how to laugh and just enjoy life together…even in this! 

So while we are sitting here visiting I look behind them and I see a very familiar family that means so much to me as well.  Blessed to have so many connections to the Whisenhunt’s and just a God little smile for me to see their name on the wall.  Thank you Gene and Kathy for making our conversation spot today such a blessing – especially after blessing us with a fantastic meal a couple weeks ago!  We love you and your family!

“The Lord is with you, mighty warrior.” Judges 6:12

As I was reading in Acts this morning, I was drawn in to Paul’s journey to Rome.  Remember I had mentioned earlier that Paul could’ve stayed where he was, safe and preaching, but he knew that he had been called to Rome to preach the good news of the gospel.  He knew death was in front of him, yet he was JOYFUL, PATIENT and FAITHFUL (those words above) .

I have noticed in my own journey, that the deeper we get with the Lord on the journey we are on, His presence and faithfulness is undeniable in the circumstances that we face.  This was true for Paul as well.  After being attacked and brought in front of angry crowds he was put back in the fortress for his own protection….

Acts 23:11

That night the Lord appeared to Paul and said, “Be encouraged, Paul. Just as you have been a witness to me here in Jerusalem, you must preach the Good News in Rome as well.”

Paul was assured by the Lord himself that no matter what was happening around him, this wasn’t where his life would end.  He must still go to Rome and testify to the Truth of the Gospel.  What a blessing for Paul to be ministered to by the Lord himself.  I have felt the Lord’s presence with me in my radiation treatments and I have seen His smile – which of course makes me smile as big as I can under that mask.  The presence of the Lord is like nothing else on earth.

But, just as has happened to Paul before, the Jews are furious with him.  “How dare he say these things about us, we are going to kill him.”  They begin to plot on how they will kill Paul to shut him up once and for all.

And as the Lord does, he put the right person (Paul’s nephew) at the right place, at the right time to hear all of this.  He went to Paul and Paul directed him to go and tell the commander what he had heard.  Paul’s nephew was given an audience with the commander and the commander listened to the Jewish plan.  He told the nephew not to let anyone know about what they talked about.

2 Kings 23:23-24

Then the commander called two of his officers and ordered, “Get 200 soldiers ready to leave for Caesarea at nine o’clock tonight. Also take 200 spearmen and 70 mounted troops. ²⁴ Provide horses for Paul to ride, and get him safely to Governor Felix.”

I love this!  So Paul is going to get to ride horses, be surrounded by soldiers for safety and get to go and see a very important person, Governor Felix.  The Lord took care of all of the details.  What seemed like a scary situation, turned into the Lord showing up…again…and providing Paul the opportunity to preach the good news to more people.  Moving him closer to Rome.  It all started with his nephew.  It took a lot for his nephew to stand up and speak truth and be Paul’s voice in front of some important people.  But he did it anyway.  FEARLESS living.

ACTS 23:31-35

So that night, as ordered, the soldiers took Paul as far as Antipatris. ³² They returned to the fortress the next morning, while the mounted troops took him on to Caesarea. ³³ When they arrived in Caesarea, they presented Paul and the letter to Governor Felix. ³⁴ He read it and then asked Paul what province he was from. “Cilicia,” Paul answered.

³⁵ “I will hear your case myself when your accusers arrive,” the governor told him. Then the governor ordered him kept in the prison at Herod’s headquarters.^[f]

I just love this.  The governor took the case himself and put him up in Herod’s headquarters.  Now more people would hear he gospel and the Governor himself would be able to hear and ask questions of Paul about this Faith that he was living out.  

As I read this today, I was thankful.  Thankful that we serve a God who provides for our every need.  He shows up in dark corners and pulls us out and gives us the opportunity to glorify Him in some amazing places.  I focused on Psalm 3 today after reading Acts :

I imagined Paul could’ve said these words, just as David had done when he was being chased by his son, who wanted him dead.  Paul knew and had experienced the REST the Lord provides, he could move forward in complete CONFIDENCE and trust that the Lord would PROTECT him because of who the LORD IS.

As I get ready to rest tonight….I want this to be my prayer.  

1. The Lord is my shield – there is no need to fear
2. He promises to hear everything I lift up to him – he is here
3. He is my protector and he watches over me – love this
4. No matter how many cancer cells exist in my brain or tumors or whatever… I am not afraid – because the Lord is fighting for me

Some ways you can pray for me:

• Praise the Lord my blood levels were perfect today!  Yeah – let’s keep those where they need to be
• I’ve done 11 treatments – and they remeasured today and said everything is getting hit right where it needs to be going
• On July 11th they will have the biopsy results from when they did the original procedure.  They will have a greater understanding of the tumor make-up and be able to determine what studies/trials are out there to fight this thing better going forward if need be
• Pray for good rest for me.  I am so thankful for not having leg cramps last night, so just want to be able to really sleep hard
• My roommate Kate from when I studied in Mexico is coming for a visit this weekend.  Pray for safe travels for her and just a God honoring – wonderful weekend.

Thank you so much warriors!  The Lord is battling each and every moment for me.

“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance

about what we do not see.” 

Hebrews 11:1

Yesterday was treatment 10.  So basically 1/3 of the way done.  I am at complete peace under my mask and honestly just love to worship loud and pray for those of you have given me prayer needs.  Listen, Jesus is holding my hand and my warriors are there battling and we are just worshiping and getting rid of those tumors in Jesus name.

I have been off of my night time steroid for two days….yeah!  I have slept better, which is good but, I’m getting less done at night -ha!  Yesterday my sweet girls were able to come to treatment with me.  I think they got tickled at how loud my music is…you can hear it outside the room – they had to post on Instagram the jam session.  I like to worship loud!  Anyway, they were able to meet my awesome team and see how the table moves and how the lasers zap me and the process.  I was blessed that they wanted to come.  I love getting to see the “usual” patients and to be able to for them as well.  God is so good to just bring sweet and wonderful people into our lives.  Love it.

My friend Tami picked the girls and I up so we could try and get the things they needed for church camp coming up.  We had fun driving around town to Good Will and Party City collecting things for Orange team and for Garrett’s Yellow team.  I love that they are so excited about camp.  I love that they love Jesus as much as they do.  I love that they have friends and teammates that challenge them and point them to Christ.  What a blessing that is for me.

I have been blessed by some pretty awesome teens and their families.  I know I’ve mentioned before on here that I coach soccer… but, not sure I ever said I never set out to coach soccer.  Back when Garrett was 4 they needed parent volunteers so we gathered our Bible Study kids together and made a little team and us parents enjoyed the Saturdays we got to hang out watching our kids “compete” lol.  I always waited and wondered when someone else would take over, but around here, soccer isn’t quite at the level of where it was in Minnesota when I was growing up.  Coaches are needed and if you know anything and are willing to do it you are pretty much it.  I’ve committed to coaching my kids and their friends for a long time.  Through this time, I have had the privilege to love on and serve so many players that it has been such a blessing to me.  Every kid I coach becomes my own.  I love to watch them work hard, try, fail, try and succeed.  Greatest feeling ever.  I don’t know how long the Lord will have me coach.  Really don’t.  But, I love ever moment and every player.

I have been blessed by so many who have stopped by, texted me, brought me sweet little gifts and just have come to hug me.  If you haven’t made investing in young people part of your life… you are missing out.  Greatest, greatest blessings ever.

I have been blessed by so many cards and I love putting them in my scrapbook – thanks Elaine Shnaekel! It has been such a blessing to fill those pages with so many awesome prayers, words and encouragement.  Thank you!  I also have a sweet little artist named Kate Chumley – a younger soccer player, future Hornet?- who has drawn me some sweet blessings of scripture.  My walls are full of God’s promises and Truths and I stand and just marvel at what I see.

We were blessed by a sweet visit from a Stuttgart native who also goes to church with us now.  She also shares the same birthday as Abbey and Ashton so they have enjoyed times of celebration together through the years.  Alana Foster brought us the most scrumptious dinner and stayed to spend time with us.  Such a blessing.  We love you Alana!  

“Every part of Scripture is God-breathed and useful one way or another-showing us truth, exposing our rebellion, correcting mistakes, training us to live God’s way.  Through the Word we are put together and shaped for the tasks God has for us.”  2 Timothy 3:16-17

I had wanted to blog yesterday…but just got to enjoy people.  But, the Lord’s words were so strong for me yesterday that I don’t want to miss out on sharing with you the power of God’s Word and it started with an 8 year old King named Josiah.

There have been so many times in my life that I have wondered if God could ever really use me for something.  I probably struggled more with this as I was younger.  But, I think we all wonder if our life has purpose.  Let me encourage you to say, YES!  Your life is significant and the Lord desires to use you in His special way and in His special time.  Every life was created for a special sweet plan and there’s NO ONE else on earth now or ever that was made for what God made you for.  I think this is an important truth for us to understand.  And as we look at 2 Kings….. we are going to see this pretty clearly.

So 8 year old Josiah is king and he grows up and in 2 Kings 22:2 it says “He did what was pleasing in the Lord’s sight and followed the example of his ancestor David.  He did not turn away from ding what was right.”  

From a young age he was committed to the Lord.  He spent the beginning of his time cleaning up the temple and rebuilding what was broken.  After all of the battles of previous kings construction needed to occur.  It sounded like it must’ve been a mess… because in the middle of everything we read this… 2 Kings 22:8

“Hilkiah the high priest said to Shaphan the court secretary, “I have found the Book of the Law in the Lord’s Temple.” Then Hilkiah gave the scroll to Shaphan, and he read it.”

Shaphan found the scroll in the mess in the temple and took the book and read it to the King.  And this is how Josiah responded..

¹¹ When the king heard what was written in the Book of the Law, he tore his clothes in despair. ¹² Then he gave these orders to Hilkiah the priest, Ahikam son of Shaphan, Acbor son of Micaiah, Shaphan the court secretary, and Asaiah the king’s personal adviser: ¹³ “Go to the Temple and speak to the Lord for me and for the people and for all Judah. Inquire about the words written in this scroll that has been found. For the Lord’s great anger is burning against us because our ancestors have not obeyed the words in this scroll. We have not been doing everything it says we must do.”

The king was in distress and tore his clothes!  He knew what that they were not following the law and he took action.  He knew how important it was and he had the priests to inquire and hear from the Lord and the Lord promised to not bring disaster on the people during Josiah’s reign because the kings heart was so broken about what had been going on in Judah and Jerusalem.  Then Josiah brought all the people together and this is what we read in 2 Kings 23:1-3

“Then the king summoned all the elders of Judah and Jerusalem. ² And the king went up to the Temple of the Lord with all the people of Judah and Jerusalem, along with the priests and the prophets—all the people from the least to the greatest. There the king read to them the entire Book of the Covenant that had been found in the Lord’s Temple. ³ The king took his place of authority beside the pillar and renewed the covenant in the Lord’s presence. He pledged to obey the Lord by keeping all his commands, laws, and decrees with all his heart and soul. In this way, he confirmed all the terms of the covenant that were written in the scroll, and all the people pledged themselves to the covenant.”

He spent the remaining years of his life on mission.  Paragraph after paragraph where he was committed to tear down and get rid of every detestable thing that didn’t honor the Lord.  What, there’s a pole over here… no big deal?  YES big deal.  Get rid of it, burn it get everything out and get rid of it.  NO excuses.  Nothing can remain.  He cleaned house big time.  Don’t care the monetary cost, it goes against the Lord.  The law of the Lord and what he read convicted him so deeply, that he was all in.  Oh to have a heart like Josiah’s.  The Lord never promised him great wealth, success in everything…but that wasn’t his focus.  His focus was to DO what was right and pleasing to the Lord.

How committed am I when the Lord reveals Truth to me?  How would my life change if I was all in like Josiah?  What if I was that committed to get rid of everything that goes against the Lord?  Then end of the passage talks about his life … 2 Kings 23:25

“Never before had there been a king like Josiah, who turned to the Lord with all his heart and soul and strength, obeying all the laws of Moses.  And there has never been a king like him since.”

What a legacy.  What a life.  Oh to be a Josiah.  Lord, may our hearts, souls and strength be all in focused on You and may we stand firm on your Truth each moment of every day.  His Word is powerful and has profound impact on lives that will submit to it’s authority and when we choose to let it change us.  Josiah let it…and it changed a nation.

This was my passage out of Psalms yesterday.  And as God does it went right with Josiah.

Where do you most find delight?  We are promised JOY if we walk away from sin and bask and soak in the Word.  Not only are we refreshed but, we are promised FRUIT!  Not just once…but with each season.  I wrote on the side over there “BE ALL IN OR NEVER LIVE” . There’s an amazing life waiting for us to experience.  I thought I had experienced the Lord…but He keeps showing me everyday that the more I dig down and push those roots down…the water is so refreshing, filling and indescribable – a JOY filled life that cannot be explained by man.

Thank you warriors for praying for me.  I have some things for us to focus on:

• Thankful thankful…last night no leg cramps – tried some Poweraid Zero they told me to try for the electrolytes or whatever 🙂 Also trying to buy water that has the electrolyte element in it.  
• Probably a bit more swelling today in my face and hands.  So don’t know if it’s the steroid drop off or the sodium that’s in the Poweraid so trying to mix things up today a bit to see what I can figure out
• I have a couple of extra appts tomorrow – blood counts, seeing the oncologist – after radiation tomorrow.  Pray for us to ask the right questions and for the doctor to have wisdom 
• Pray for good rest for me.  I have to be honest, I think about a lot of things and I know I need to shut down and just rest.  So pray my brain will just allow me to rest best.
• Pray that we are able to get everything together for the kid’s church trip and we aren’t running around crazy at the end – you know teenagers!